If only it was just the blog I was feeling over due on...
The truth is, I've been feeling like I can't keep up with much of anything these days. School, my relationship, the chores, the bills, the things we just pretend aren't happening... out of sight, out of mind, right? Not exactly responsible. But it almost feels like, "what the hell am I supposed to do about it?" I'm only one person and let's face it, Ben's even worse than I am about getting, being, or staying organized with all this crap. sigh....
It's not really all that bad. The majority of those nasty hormones are finally out of my body!! I'm starting to feel human again. After so many, many years of battling with my inner demons, I can see the light, and I feel it too :). That's nice. My patience and anger control? Well, at least I feel like I stand a chance now, and that's a lot more than I've ever been able to say before.
And while our relationship isn't perfect, no ones is. But somehow we've made it through the past four years and finally feel like we are where we want to be. Engaged!! The right step in the right direction, it's fantastic. And the communication? We get better at it all the time. Now if we could just figure out that pesky anger thing...
Luke is the smartest kid ever. Every day he says something to us that blows us away and makes us laugh. He is developing a slight jealous bone with his sister. I think the novelty is starting to wear off and the reality that every ounce of our attention can't always be his is starting to set in. Which is ok, we're all learning to spread the love around. He gets bigger every day and breaks my heart by reminding me that my baby boy is gone forever. However, he also makes me so proud by showing me what a truly amazing man he's going to grow up and be.
And my little chunk of love? What's to say? I am in love. She is my best friend. That incredible smile lights up your whole heart. She's learning to crawl, she says "dah", she LOVES to eat. In fact, if we dare to sit down to a meal while she's awake, she does not hesitate to let us know that she would like to join us. So she's also trying new foods every day. She adores her brother and is a fanatic about his toys. I think she's stolen all of our hearts, there's no hope for us now.
All and all, life for us Creechers (ok, I'm still a "soon-to-be") is really starting to look up. Now, if only I didn't feel like a little girl trapped in a big girls world...
